We are an organization that serves Women and their families through our Teaching, Intercessory Prayers, Missions and Outreach ministries.

Statement of Faith

We believe in:

1. The Holy Trinity, God the Father, God the Son, and the person of the Holy Spirit as one. 1 John 5:7

2. Baptism of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues. Acts 1:5

3. New testament biblical practices of the Holy communion, washing of the feet, sprinkling of the Blood. John 13:3-8, Acts 19:11-12, John 13:3-8.

4. The manifestation of God's power through signs and wonders, Luke 9:1, 1 Corin 2:4, Isaiah 8:18.

5. The deity of our Lord Jesus Christ, the virgin birth, His sinless life, His miracles, His atoning death through his shed blood, His bodily resurrection, His ascension to the right hand of God, the Father and in His personal return to earth in power and glory.

6. The Infallibility of the Holy Scriptures, the Bible as the final authority in all matters of doctrine, conducts relative to daily living.

7. The administration of spiritual gifts led by the Spirit for the edification of the church of God. 1 Corinthians 12:4-7

8. The personal return of Jesus Christ, the eternal damnation in a literal hell for the wicked and everlasting life with the living God for the righteous.

"Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion, for behold i come and I will dwell in your midst, declare the Lord" Zechariah 2:10.

DOZme Women's International Fellowship

Are you needing encouragement or prayers? We have a group of prayer warriors "WHEN WOMEN PRAY" who meet daily to intercede on behalf of the Body of Christ. The Lord of Glory is always in our midst to hear and answer. These women of faith are ready to pray along with you and offer encouragement. If interested in prayers or requesting more information , please email us @ dozmeinternational@gmail.com

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Overcoming the pain of Adultery

Scripture Text:  Proverbs 6:23-33
 by  Kemi O.

I am no therapist or expert when it comes to matters of the heart but you must all agree with me that  it is very depressing and sad when you look around our world today and see so many marriages in turmoil.  The most shocking of it all is that, it is very rampant today in the body of Christ i.e the CHURCH Community.   After reading books, listening to friends, neighbors, watching the news, witnessing the break down of the marriages and relationships of loved ones as well as my own past experiences,   I have come to the conclusion that one of the greatest marriage destroyers of all time is " Adultery". It is not only a sin against God but it is a sin that causes so much emotional pain to the other parties involved (spouse and children). If you look at the statistics today on the divorce rate, you will see that over 30% of the marriages that end up in divorce is as a result of infidelity/adultery.

By the way, what do we mean by Adultery? Adultery by the dictionary definition is extra marital sex that willfully and maliciously interferes with marital relations. Some people confuse adultery with fornication because they are both transgressions before God involving sexual relations.  The difference between fornication and adultery is that fornication is the act of having pre-marital sex with another unmarried person so it usually pertains to someone who is single, however adultery pertains to sexual intercourse with someone other than your spouse.

   The sin of Adultery is a disastrous reality that has existed and afflicted mankind since the beginning of time. For believers, one of the most well known accounts of adultery recorded in scripture is revealed in the story of King David and his affair with Bathsheba. 2 Sam 11:2-27. Although King David proactively pursued Bathsheba, the strange woman, some respected and anointed men of God that we know personally or heard about, have actually fallen victim to the beauty and flattery tongue of the strange woman Proverbs 6:24-25.  And as a result, the anointing of God on their lives as well as their marriages are destroyed and these seductresses can be found every where i.e  work place, neighborhood, even in the church  etc.  There was an incident in the fellowship I was attending several years ago where a man of God whom I so much respected had been having a number of affairs with the female members of the church.   He was quite a handsome preacher and about 90% of his congregation were women but that large percentage never seemed to bother me, for all I saw was  the anointing of God on his life and how the Lord was using him mightily especially in the area of deliverance. It never occurred to me that such a thing would happen to him and as a result of his succumbing to the flesh, his ministry suffered a terrible blow, marriages were destroyed, for a couple of sisters he was sleeping with also happen to be married. It was a very unfortunate incident and so brethren, this is a serious issue that needs to be addressed in the church today. We are an adulterous generation.

     When adultery taints the purity of the marriage covenant, the road to reconciliation is usually quite difficult especially for the spouse who has been betrayed. Sadly to say, many Christians have skipped the reconciliation process because they find it difficult to forgive their cheating spouses.  Decisions of separation and divorce are therefore made in haste out of pain and anger.  Can you really blame them?  However, we should ask ourselves a personal question. Will this be God’s purpose or will for me if I do this?  Many have used the famous words of our Lord Jesus in Matthew 19:9 to justify their decision for divorce but if everyone who has been through the pain of adultery decides to obtain a divorce, how many marriages or christian homes will truly remain standing? There has to be room for forgiveness. the same scriptures tells us to forgive those who have trespassed against us and also that God hates putting away i.e  divorce Malachi 2:16. As painful as the betrayal is, an effort at saving the marriage should be made especially in a christian union that has been ordained and blessed with children. God’s thoughts towards us are good and not of evil to give us an expected end ( a hope and a future).  Divorce was never in God’s plan for man and therefore it is evil, it is the work and plan of the enemy to destroy marriages especially christian marriages. His only job is to kill, to steal and to destroy, John 10:10.  Having said all this, it is also not an excuse for the adulterous spouse to keep cheating on his or her spouse just because he or she has been forgiven. That will be totally evil, manipulative and selfish to do so.
    It pleases the Lord to see the Man and the Woman reconcile because it also causes them to be reconciled back to God as a family. He assures us that He will be with us always even in times of trouble.
Having said  this, we know that rebuilding a relationship is definitely not an easy task for it will take both time and effort on both sides to make it happen. Above all, it will take the grace of God to bring harmony back into the home again  Psalm 133.

i). The first step to rebuilding the marriage is for the adulterer to be willing to repent of his or her sins.  He or she must genuinely confess their sins to God and genuinely repent.

ii). The betrayed spouse(victim) must be willing to forgive in order for the healing process to begin.

iii). Couple should seek biblical counseling immediately for it helps both parties to understand why it happened and how to avoid it from happening again.

iv). In addition to counseling, the couple should spend time in prayer seeking God’s face and asking for His grace and power to get them through the tough times.

v). The adulterous spouse should be accountable to someone in order for that trust to be rebuilt. Most likely he needs to be accountable to his spouse, pastor, or a biblical counselor.

 vi). I would also say that in addition to seeking biblical or professional counseling, talking to a trusted friend or loved one also helps the healing process.
I  have had the opportunity to counsel both relatives and friends who have all suffered from the acts of an adulterous spouse and they all had one thing in common and that was feeling better after sharing their troubles with someone they could confide in. One who is patient and offers a listening ear does make the difference.

For those of you who have been betrayed and are still harboring unforgiveness towards your spouse, give God your heart and trust him completely for your healing. Proverbs 3:5. Do not harbor unforgiveness in your heart for then you also will be sinning against God and it is also unhealthy for your spirit, body & soul.  Trust the Lord for your marriage and your family for He is with you to guide and see you through every step of the way.  Do not forget that your spouse is human and as long as we are still in the flesh, even we that are believers have the tendency to still commit sin and hurt someone we loved intentional or not.  None of us are beyond temptation and that is why we have to ask God for His grace daily to deliver us from every temptation that comes our way. On the other hand,  if you are the one who betrayed your spouse, it is time for you to also seek God's forgiveness, forgive yourself, ask for your spouse's forgiveness and allow the Lord to lead you as you seek His face for the restoration of your home and marriage.
Forgiveness is a big step in the reconciliation process and it cannot be avoided. Do your part and leave the rest to the Lord whichever side of the fence you are on.  As He is working on you, He will also be working on your spouse through His Holy Spirit. In due time, He will make everything beautiful again, for He will give you beauty for ashes and joy for pain because you have decided to surrender all to Him.


Anonymous said...

Very helpful article. thank you.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this article..its been quite helpful.

Trina B.
Boston, MA

Anonymous said...

Thank you..I am being blessed by this article.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Sister... You are truly an inspiration.